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realization
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Toxic_Kisses
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I made a realization last night
after writing "Cute"
It’s easier for me to except ppl who out right and blatantly hate/dislike me than it is for me to except ppl who kind to me and/or like me
Granted every one enjoys expectance and friendship and I am no exception, yet for some reason I always fear that the ppl who like me are just pretending and using me, I guess you could say like wearing a mask, and that indeed @ any moment they could take their masks off and deceive, betray, lie and hate me.
Some how it hurts more to be liked and than hated than it does to be hated/disliked right from the get-go of things.
Heck it doesn’t even bother mean when ppl hate/dislike me right from the start, its just kind of excepted. That way I can either ignore them or antagonize annoy and anger them whenever I feel like it. Yet w/ ppl who call them selves my friends I never know when they’re going to turn on me, it’s like walking on thin ice, any moment you could fall though it.
*Sigh* man I'm fucked up.
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011219
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... |
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me too
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*Sigh* man I'm fucked up.
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030208
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... |
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me three
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*Sigh* man I'm fucked up.
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030208
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... |
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everybody
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*Sigh* man I'm fucked up.
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030208
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... |
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pilgrim
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Do We Sense the Essential Theme of Humanity Here?
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030209
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belly fire
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I came back unchanged
that was the realization
expecting to be different somehow
and yet being that much more as I was
for some reason that was comforting
and I slept the better for it
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030415
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... |
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no reason
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i may need to start at the bottom
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080213
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... |
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47 minutes
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You always fight hardest when I'm pulling away, so I pull away just to feel your strength.
But this morning you didn't fight, and I'm not sure what that means
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120211
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no reason
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when i don't feel good about myself, i turn to you. when i do feel good about myself, i turn to other_you.
maybe neither is enough.
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140525
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what's it to you?
who
go
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blather
from
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