memail love monee dear nomme, it's saturday and all your halloween plans are cancelled it's 4:13 pm on your clock, it reads wrongly it is probably something more like 4:20 you have a bowl and water to drink tiny blue plastic bowl, you felt too tired to wash a cup you've been too tired lately selfishly bored you think of writing to people but there is no one to write to who wants to hear you? you don't know enough people you don't know people well enough you feel like you can't keep in touch you wonder if you've ever really touched you had a dream recently about diamonds in ears listening is a gift you wish you could give your mouth is a tool you wish you could use it's saturday and all your halloweens are cancelled you're thinking of a rag doll with big blush circles she thinks she is in a play she is skipping down a hill in 1988 nanaimo when she gets to one door she screams "cat killer!!!!!!" at another door she sees the biggest locust in the world ever this is her first time trick-or-treating, if you're remembering correctly at school next week she'll hear about a razorblade in the throat of a classmate's brother ...time is passing... you're remembering two kids in marpole, westside vancouver how they drove down the streets with their growing feet dancing the doorbells of '93 their bodies gloved in costumes their bodies close when they danced how they smiled and laughed collecting candy ...and time keeps passing... you're forgetting a dog who followed a lost girl home from a rave in the drunken dark of 1995 how she talked to the dog like he is a someone sent by the gods do you remember how he followed her all the way from downtown to uphill like he was her friend, protector he is a black dog with a white soul at her front door she'll tell him she can't feed him she'll close the door on his eyes wondering where he will disappear to and she'll fall she'll fall into a deep sleep she'll wonder if she'll ever wake up ...yeah time is always passing... you're thinking of emptiness of dreams, of years it's about 5:30 now, probably 5:40ish you've been sitting blanking out your father called down the stairs a while ago burger's are ready, food's getting cold you'll copy this before pressing blather, justincase the words don't make it to the page by themselves okay and you'll go have breakfast now and you'll think of ways to spend the rest of your 2004 evenings you'll probably look back at all of this again, in fact you're probably reading this already you're probably wishing you could become a real good writer_someday, because when you read this you'll laugh at it and feel it was writ so poorly but anyway, enough already just wanted to say happy halloween, 041030 ... crOwl nice. 041030 ... jane {very lovely} 070814 what's it to you? who go blather from