i_didn't_ask_for_it epitome of incomprehensibility My on-and-off tutoring-centre-admin job. I_asked_for_it this summer, but not for... 1) boss B. to lecture me on time_management for 30 minutes while the information could be conveyed in 3. I told him that. A bit more nicely. Although he seized on my frustrated phrase "bombarding me with examples," and joked, while he was explaining something technically useful, "I hope I'm not bombarding you with examples." No, B., not at this precise moment. 2) boss B. to verbally prod a sore spot: me being bad_at_categorizing things. Granted, he doesn't understand that, and I shouldn't expect him to. But! Tell me, B., how I can tell these two things apart: -things that aren't explicitly listed but that you want me to do anyway and -things that aren't explicitly listed so are therefore "outside the system" Hmmm, B.?? 3) "promoting" me to senior admin assistant and still paying me less per hour than what the main admin assistant made. I know it's a small company, but is that fair? Maybe Jesus would accept that. The leader has to be the servant, after all. But then Jesus never worked in a tutoring centre. Specialized in carpentry; dabbled in health, public speaking, and martyrdom. I don't plan to follow the same career path. But what's if Jesus had a point? Sure, back in January, B. had some sort of chutzpah - something with an uvular or velar_fricative, anyway - to say, "Now that I want to hire you for more hours, which is sort of a promotion, it will have to be for $16/hr instead of $17/hr." (Mind you, the change in title only came this summer, with his and N.'s idea that he wants me to come in regularly every second weekday and supervise the other two to-be-hired admins.) Aaaanyway. Jesus had a point. Or maybe it was Marx. Why should I be paid more just because I'm a "senior" admin? Last term I was only coming in part-time, doing less stressful things than the main admin person was. Generally, the grunt workers have harder jobs than their supervisors. So: Down with capitalism! To each according to their effort, or something like that! ...But still. Aren't I worth $17/hr? In September you'd better pay me $17/hr. Or I'll write a novel that has nothing to do with you. Be warned, be very warned! 230812 ... e_o_i I came very close to quitting today. But I agreed to too many things for that to be really fair. 230814 ... e_o_i What I mean is that B. is counting on me to work Mondays and Wednesdays (and half of Fridays); we'd agreed on that. I'm to supervise the new admin assistant(s) so he can work on other things. So it wouldn't really be fair of me to bow out, even if I give the traditional two weeks' notice. I don't think I'll work beyond my contract this year, at least not in the admin team. I might be somewhere else. Ontario, perhaps. England? Germany?? There are too many unknowns. But for now, I think the best thing to do is to stick to what I'd promised. After all, I was the stupid one, going off in a huff and saying, "But this_is_Canada!" (context over there) 230814 ... Soma “Nobody ever asks for it” you said. Your look was everything I hated to feel all summed up in one pitying blink. Your look was one that said you had been here, crying these same hot tears. Seething over soiled clothes and bloodied flesh. You aura was one of quiet surrender. Your gaze took what little I had left inside me somewhere far away. I never wanted so badly to be a child again as I did that day. But I wasn’t. And I wouldn’t be. I guess it made sense then. Some things don’t happen no matter how much you ask. Some things happen no matter how little you asked. 241126 what's it to you? who go blather from