cv epitome of incomprehensibility So, my mother doesn't want me to put "To create a nice document with wide margins using Microsoft Word" under "Professional Objectives". I was just trying to make a format and fill it with text. All three of the family people told me I should apply for a certain teaching job today. In succession. Without consulting each other. It made me cry, and then my brother got upset and loudly asked the universe and me what was wrong. Thing is, I cry easily. I cried when my MA program director told the class that the program would be tough. I cried over not having the time to read a book that my friend Jocelyn was going to lend me. I cried a few days ago after reading a book that was not sad at all, just vaguely nostalgic for me. And what's if my career goal is to create a nice document with wide margins? I could also create a wide document with nice margins. That works too. 170830 ... unhinged i cried easily in childhood. i cried easily today watching a video of people being interviewed after a speech bernie sanders gave recently. i have noticed too that other people get upset when your reaction is to cry. that boys often get aggressive and nasty when i cry. or at the least irritated. i used to feel guilty for that. after years of dealing with the consequences of repression, now i say: fuck your noise. our world needs an emotional reaction right now. logic and reason have brought us neoliberalism, oligarchy, climate change, and staggering income inequality. i want to make a world that fixed those things because i am heartbroken over those things. my father says my big heart is my downfall. i think my big heart fuels some of my best qualities. but it also fuels my voracious capacity for depression. such is the reality of a life lived with feeling. the older i get the less i care about repressing myself to make others comfortable. you think my tears are irritating? when did you lose your humanity? 170830 ... e_o_i But you're emotional about things that deserve emotion! My emotions are often very silly. Anyway, yes. Don't let people bug you about having emotional reactions. That itself is more irrational than any reaction. I think that greed is more to blame for oligarchy, etc, than logic is. But that doesn't mean that rationality isn't misused. Back to me and CVs, it's not just money that makes me want to apply for other jobs. I want to do something that I like and that I'm good at (those goals are a kind of greed too, I guess). But if I want to, why am I scared to? Experience says I'm better at teaching than being a secretary; my bosses aren't horrible, but they've been bullying and inflexible in petty ways. So there's reason to want something different, and I'm sure my family meant well in this case. It's just - the road to good intentions is paved with hell. 170902 what's it to you? who go blather from