sober kingsuperspecial that confusing state in which the brain is allowed to run amuck complelely free of any medication. bad, bad idea. (a) stolichnaya for me, please 010615 ... birdmad and more Southern Comfort when i get home from the office 010615 ... nocturnal tryin to beat it, doin the best I can. been drinkin since about 5:30. it's now just after 11. I just drove home on I-10 and nothing at all interesting happened. I hate sobriety. fortunately, I'm about to go back out, so maybe I can resist it yet! 010615 ... kingsuperspecial yeah - I just drank my ass off from 5:00 until 2:00am, and I'm not sightly happy about it. right now, being sober would be the equivilant of sticking a nice sharp point in the underside of my wrist and dragging it up my arm until I either reached my shoulder or passed out from the pain. there would be a grand finality in that, rather than this BS maybe now maybe later shit that is all anyone seems to have to offer me. of course, I'm not sober, so I don't have to worry about that. instead, I can just ramble like an idiot and pass out in the shower. 010616 ... nocturnal in case any of you were concerned that the sobriety may have won, I assure you it did not. and, to make it even better, it began being defeated as I sat in a bar with my sister and mother drinking it away together, as a family. don't worry, people took pictures of us all sitting, drinking, and swaying to the music together, as a family. it was the funniest thing you ever saw, except that you didn't see it, so I guess maybe not. 010616 ... unhinged hell no, thank god. 010616 ... god that reminds me... (get a beer) 010619 ... fallen a place that i do not want to be 010627 ... psychobabe awesome song man ya know being sober isnt the worst thing ever. Sure its great and fun when your drunk and getting drunk but dude, in the end you usually puke all over and are in pain. Why go through with all that just to have pain in the end? i dunno, sure i've been drunk at parties sure i've been sober at parties, the whole concept really doesnt enlighten me tho 011201 ... guitar_freak hell yes, thank god!! 011201 ... ShilohLives sober is the only thing I've ever been... 030624 ... peyton why try to stay sober when I'm dying here 050619 ... tender_square did you just get a coke? she studied the thick girth of my glass in comparison to her slender stemware. yeah, i said. i was an outlier at a table of liquid lunchers. you don't drink? she pressed. she was on her second double vodka water. no, i'm sober, i answered. oh, give it six months and that'll change working here, she mocked. i used to be good about it, but this place was a bad influence on me. i should hope not, i countered. i've been sober for nine years, i said. saying those words, rubbing shoulders with day drinkers, these new coworkers who wondered aloud when the company bar would open that afternoon, cast a shadow of uncertainty over me: i can't get cocky in these circumstances. nine years doesn't mean shit and can turn on a dime. 230609 what's it to you? who go blather from