kurt_cobain
nr
there
is
a
certain
comfort
in
being
sad
.
he
was
right
about
that
.
but
there
is
no
comfort
at
all
in
being
depressed
.
230410
...
raze
jamie
told
me
to
read
"heavier
than
heaven
".
so
i
did
.
and
maybe
there's
too
much
fiction
mixed
in
with
the
truth
of
a
man's
life
when
the
man
himself
isn't
around
to
say
what
he
saw
or
unspool
the
molten
mess
of
his
mind
.
but
for
the
day
or
two
it
took
me
to
get
through
that
monochrome
tome,
i
felt
like
i
was
right
there
with
him
.
i
think
i
wanted
to
be
him
before
i
worked
out
who
i
was
.
i
remember
watching
"
live
!
tonight
!
sold
out
!!"
on
vhs
in
gord's converted
shed
of
a
bedroom
.
kurt
sang
"
come
as
you
are
"
like
he
was
trying
to
strangle
his
own
song
.
tyson
said
he
was
strung
out
,
when
really
he'd
just
grown
to
hate
his
audience
as
much
as
he
hated
himself
.
i
was
stoned
enough
to
believe
him
.
all
that
off
-key
screaming
through
a
nest
of
sweat
-drenched
hair
.
i
saw
pain
in
the
place
of
scorn.
that
stuck
with
me
.
even
if
it
was
wrong
.
i
tried
to
imagine
what
"
you
know
you're
right
"
sounded
like
six
months
before
it
saw
the
light
of
day
almost
a
decade
after
the
fact
.
i
listened
to
"
in
utero"
on
headphones
until
the
drum
sound
was
burned
into
my
brain
.
i
sang
a
verse
from
"
paper
cuts
"
on
a
friend's
answering_machine
and
slow
danced
with
myself
to
"
dumb
"
at
nine_ball_heaven
after
gord
choked
the
jukebox
with
all
the
quarters
his
pockets
could
carry
.
i
learned
kurt
bought
his
first
amp
with
the
money
he
made
pawning
his
stepfather's
guns
.
he
dug
them
out
of
the
aberdeen
river
his
mother
threw
them
in
when
she
found
out
he
was
cheating
on
her
.
i
got
the
same
distortion
pedal
he
favoured.
i
wore
his
face
on
my
chest
.
but
i
could
never
make
my
guitar
sound
the
way
his
did
—
like
something
broken
that
was
trying
and
failing
to
piece
itself
back
together
.
230412
...
ancasa.reyn
if
i
were
maybe
ten
years
younger
kurt
cobain
and
nirvana
might
have
played
a
more
important
part
in
my
sphere
of
musical influences
but
no
,
i
didn't
take
the
time
so
it's
kind
of
weird
to
know
that
were
he
still
alive
the
whole
six
degrees
of
separation
thing
would
put
him
but
one
person
away
from
me
the
same
applies
to
elliott smith
and
daniel
johnston
who
i
actually
met
but
didn't
really
meet
(
if
you
know
what
i
mean
)
he
sat
across
from
me
either
sleeping
or
half
-sleeping
on
the
green
room
couch
oblivious
to
the
hangers
on
hanging
on
250723
what's it to you?
who
go
blather
from