lacuna
raze acne scars and handlebars i never got to see. a smile that could melt all the crushed diamonds at my feet. you were the spitting image of your older brother. what was hard and mean in him wasn't in you at all. your eyes told everyone who you were before they knew you. felt-covered wooden hammers struck sad strings thinned out by all the clumsy young fingers that bashed those eighty-eight colourless keys and took their dreams away. brown bangs framed your forehead, shielding what was precious from the ditchwater and the dirt we called our lives. each divot in your skin a villanelle. i hid from all the love you held. i wouldn't have known what to do with it. i was so old then. older than i've ever been. you must be a mother now. you must be the best mother any child has ever had. you must have daughters. you have to know you can let their bangs grow out. your arms are all the armour they'll ever need. 220215
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