ida jane Ida is somewhere around 46, but she looks 62. Her weathered fingers are tipped off with "fancy" silver nails, the kind you wouldn't buy at a bodega. She switches her cigarette from hand to hand. She's wearing mascara, but her lids are swollen; you can barely see her blue eyes. She was probably a looker in her day. She yells at me from across 12th street: "COME HERE I LOVE YOUR HAIR" - no punctuation - she lost her commas along with everything else. I'm walking that way anyway, so I choose to smile and have this conversation, even though I'm already late. She needs this more than I need three minutes. She doesn't even have punctuation. Ida tells me she doesn't live in the building, but after pointing out blues and lavenders, she tells me she wants to add color in to hers. She wants to do something fun. She asks me if I have any extra dye, and runs through a sentence including a name and apartment number I miss, in case I ever want to stop by. I peer over my sunglasses frames to take a look at her wavy blond, slightly scraggly ponytail. It's drawn back with an old scrunchy, the kind you wouldn't buy at a bodega. I tell her blue would bring out her eyes. She asks me how much I'd charge to do her hair. I told her I have my girlfriend help me, and after she suggests she doesn't have any friends, she admits that her friends are "bums and drug addicts" - her words - and I try to silently explain that we are all addicted in a way - (I've been there, Ida) - and she tells me she sells meth in the building I'm standing next to. She says she loves her clients, and they're mostly gay, but she's not gay, she's got a man. She loves the gays. I give her a triumphant punch to the sky and laugh, tell her they're good at hair, and smile as I continue on. 140402 ... epitome of incomprehensibility Great sketch. I feel like this would be real even if it wasn't, and I like the little repetitions. (I had to look up the word "bodega" because I don't know anything. It's what people in Quebec call a "dépanneur" or "dep" and the people I talked to in Ontario call a "corner store" even if it isn't on the corner.) 140403 what's it to you? who go blather from