doppelganger miasma shadow of my spirit, dark side of my moon...i like having you around to indulge my evil side 030523 ... megan #$%#$% 030523 ... kali and there are all these dogs, and yetis, and aliens... it is totally fucked up 030524 ... kyla Infinity_War 040914 ... margaux she gets around. 100926 ... raze a long time ago, i had this paranoid fantasy while washing dishes that my evil doppelganger was going to walk into the kitchen, and it would hit me with sickening finality that he was going to step into my life. i would be forced to watch as he took my place, twisting my actions and interactions with the people i cared about in whatever directions he saw fit. no one would know this demonic twin wasn't really me, and i would be more or less a ghost, powerless to interfere. it was horrifying. i think it was his smile that put it over the top. the smug, knowing grin of a blood-soaked king. not that anything happened. but i could see the possibility of it very vividly. strange things happen when you're washing dishes and you let your mind wander. now i try to keep it on a leash whenever i'm elbow-deep in soapy water. 130922 ... tender_square she was speaking on her cell phone in the tim hortons. it sounded like a social worker was on the other side of the call. the woman was fidgety, her legs restlessly bouncing as she nursed warm caffeination in a paper cup. her bleached blonde hair was bundled into a haphazard ponytail and stuffed under a ball cap. she spoke of two year of non-stop trauma, culminating in her mother having to move in with her. "i'm an only child," she added. she talked about ptsd, and having a mental breakdown that put her in hospital. "my kid needed an operation," she revealed. "oh, when i say kid i mean my dog," she said. "they are my children." the psychological keywords this woman used, her anxious energy, her appearance, how she insisted her animals were the equivalent of flesh and blood, all of it screamed of my younger sister. i felt stress-by-association being in the orbit of this woman who inventoried the disasters of her life in breathless speed. 230320 what's it to you? who go blather from