receipts raze numbers and words pin objects to fixed points in time, to years, to days inside the years, to other numbers and other words. i remember sliding on the ice in my black winter boots, too afraid to step into the skates everyone else was wearing. because how could you stand on something so thin? five thousand years ago we stood on bone, but i never trusted a pair of metal blades to keep me upright. i remember looking at the small shavings my feet made. fragments of a chemical winter. they played hockey here. they must have bled on this ice. must have given their bodies to it. but they washed all that away before seventh graders like us showed up for our field trips. i remember sitting alone at a table and eating nachos, round tortilla chips drenched in something orange that called itself cheese, thinking there was nothing in the world better than this. eating all that salty hot and waiting for something that was more to me than numbers and words on a piece of paper. i think i loved the waiting almost as much as what it brought me. 210803 ... raze flowers. anemones yellow lilies irises and lisianthus. she said she'd keep them even after they died. they've been dead and gone for more than ten years, but i can rebuild the arrangement in my mind. little frog. prairie gentian. greek rainbow goddess. the inflorescence of memory. 210814 ... unhinged 'show me the receipts' 'citation needed' people are literally telling each other that 'citation needed' the receipts for my opinions are literally tattooed all over my body and my prayers and my art i don't need expert validation no one else can be the expert of me but me as far as medical science goes the peer reviewed research i have used to formulate my own interpretation of the facts (like a scientist would) are readily available to all on the glorious internet why should i spoonfeed it to you? science by the nature of the scientific method is never 'settled' scientism on the other hand just replaces God with science to bludgeon others over the head a 21st century inquisition josef mengele would be proud 210815 what's it to you? who go blather from