inherent
unhinged unprettiness

even though the buddha of self worth has been stirred in me, i can't help thinking it. i've been alone for so much of my life it has to be me. right?

(i have an internalization habit) 		090203
...
rt your man is coming to you in the right time. 090203
...
unhinged or wo(man)

really? at the risk of sounding like a petulant, whiny child when is the right time exactly? how long do i have to wait? is it me? my stars? but really, how long do i have to wait to love someone the way i know i am meant to? the three months of my life i spent with him are receding to an island of mythic proportions.

i am sick and fucking tired of sleeping alone


or worse
sleeping with men i can't stand
terrified_of_being_cool
terrified_of_being_sweet
the sister
the friend
the stepping stone

we started emailing again recently and he said i need to stop being so 'ass rammingly nice' maybe if i became a raving bitch my prince charming would finally find me. 		090204
...
unhinged (it has been almost six years since i regularly slept next to someone i loved; it is just cruel at this point. that every person i decide to open_up to is unavailable in one form or another. do i pick them on purpose?) 090204
...
unhinged still alone
no longer questioning why
no longer trying
no longer caring

(maybe i'm still in denial) 		160519
what's it to you?
who go 		blather
from