contingencies past it's a weird thing to admit, especially as great powers have been fighting with and against proxies for years, but the current state of the world seems...more direct. escalation more likely? is this how my parents and older siblings felt, growing up in the shadow of obliteration? it's a weird thing to admit that i've been lying in the kids' room as they settle to sleep (still needing a comforting presence to help that passage) looking at different blast radii websites, through different locations that as a local "make sense" in that sick kind of way. it's a weird thing, thinking if we had half an hour, would we be able to get away from any of the venn diagrams of concentric, intersecting circles? or just be caught with thousands on the highway (or streets leading to it more likely)? is the cold storage in the basement the right (cramped) call? what kind of curtains for the basement windows? is this the line of thought that resulted in people buying bomb shelters? it's weird to think of the bikes, as a preferred way to traverse the city, as a real postapocalyptic option to try to preserve, keeping allen keys and parts near by and being thankful for years of tinkering leading to basic knowledge. it's weird to see all the evils unleashed for these millenia of our species and it's cousins and wonder if we cracked the box back open, would hope still be hiding there? 220303 ... past a light morning conversation while making pancakes. "do, do you think you'd get conscripted if there's a world war?" she asked while holding the baby and the boys ran loops of the house. "glasses probably isn't a limitation." "no, if it's a world war we're in or just outside a couple blast zones so i doubt anyone near us would be conscripted." i replied as i flipped a pancake on to the stove beside the frying pan. 220320 what's it to you? who go blather from