how_soon_is_now kerry sitting in the floor in front of the TV and morrissey is swinging his hips like he just doesn't know what else he's supposed to do. as if he doesn't understand that i'm sad tonight and have to listen to "how soon is now?" and pretend i'm not the most dejected person tonight. he just doesn't want to address me. fine, i say. i'm checking computers periodically plunging my tongue into the ice cream and it's not even got sugar in it, like trying to bust my fist through the window only to find it's plexiglass..... i can't break it. this is the worst hour. and it was right as i stepped in the door my ears caught the wretching sounds from the basement. my dying dog collapsing in her own vomit and she won't be torn away from it so finally i just wrap my arms beneath and around her and drag her from her bed, carrying her up the stairs and slamming the basement door shut. she won't be sniffing around there anytime soon. it was you who forgot and i'm sitting in borders reading your favorite poem. you who forgot and what am i doing but staring at ferlinghetti and kerouac that are perched on my kitchen counter smearing their index fingers in the leftover beandip i couldnt bring myself to lick clean. i watch another music video and take a phone call and find myself here again. pouring out my thoughts to the infinite red because i have no one else that wants to listen to me bitch anymore. 040207 ... . wow. kerry is back. 040208 ... stephen patrick morriseys evil twin see i've already waited too long and all my hope is gone 040208 ... kerry maybe 040209 what's it to you? who go blather from