invisible sans nom invisible_world 040213 ... swinger of birches i feel like the last song on "a mark, a mission, a brand, a scar." i haven't talked to jeremy in three weeks, i've been back that long. i can't stand to toy with the idea that maybe he found someone new while i was in europe. my emails go unanswered. and this is how i feel, like a wad of newspaper chucked at the wastebasket, except i don't even get the thrill of making it in there, i bounce off the rim and the free throw is no good. i'm sitting somewhere on the floor in a corner. 040214 ... gja unseeable 080704 ... nr i think it's about more than introversion vs. extroversion. we're not exactly friends and we hardly ever see each other, but we do have some friends in common. i'm not sure if they see each other often either. he just doesn't see or hear me or want to pay attention to me unless he decides to talk to me. i was right in front of him trying to answer his question, and he was sort of looking into the distance to try to find the answer from someone else. it wasn't until multiple people started saying his name to direct his attention over to me that he noticed me. 221023 ... nr two of my loud and chatty friends were dominating the conversation, as their personalities often lead them to do. one of them said "i'd forgotten about that, but [sarah] reminded me earlier." it was actually me who'd reminded her, not sarah, but i'm more easily overlooked by these types. 221023 ... nr a friend said she didn't know how to help me with this. i said she didn't have to help; it's just something that happens with certain people, and i often have to surround myself with other types of people if i want to counteract it. but this sort of behaviour being normalized makes it so surprising when someone really cares to listen to what i have to say. 221023 what's it to you? who go blather from