thethreadbetweenchocolateandcatonahottinroof_ii Anna_Began(Getting Frustrated) Testing 030712 ... Anna_Began I don't believe there has ever been a moment in my life that I have not been addicted to something. Driving up to that small town just north of the state line you crossed my mind for the very first time when you weren't within my immediate keystrokes. Something about you, and yearning to speak with you and looking forward to the next time we'd talk. I'd tied you up in Doritos and journals but I'd yet to tie you up as I eventually would. Somewhere between superficial acknowledgement of common bands and realizations about philosophy and experiences and the future you sunk into my veins. Seven months later I'm having a difficult time balancing the healthy and pure with the fiend and placebos. If I could wrap up each of the tiny gems you have placed into my hands and lock them in a pewter box engraved with the lyrics of all of the songs we've kissed to, it would be enough to last me a lifetime. But I know me and every two and a half seconds I'd have to throw the box on the floor just to see if it would break. In time, I will learn to focus on self-sufficiency, adaptation, trust, on the more consistant basis. Like heroin you are to me right now. Future unknown: Overdose? Fade to gray? Fizzle or infatuate over and again? You sent me a message that night when I arrived home. I'd already eaten six of the peanut butter filled varieties. Something about a Brick and a Coat (and I thought hair, but I was wrong). You were hiding you said, probably from her, but not from me. The Jesus and Mary Chain tittered in my head and I felt a growing connection. Somewhere between route 15 and July, I began to understand. This will always be about connections in everything. 030712 what's it to you? who go blather from