the_grizzled_one raze thunderbolt might be gone. i don't like to think that way. hate to even consider the possibility. but i haven't seen him since the end of august. he's never been one to miss this much time. the longest he's been away is a few days at a stretch. and that's only happened once or twice. he was the first backyard visitor who got a name. months before he decided he was curious enough to take a closer look at me, i would watch him forage on the other side of the street, his brilliant red tail trailing behind him like a flame. when all the colour left that furry balance beam, the fire shot straight into his heart. he never got as comfortable with me as most of the others did. but he learned to trust me more than i thought he would. i don't think i've ever known a more cantankerous squirrel. you could see it in his face. he didn't take shit from anyone. when he was angry, his grumbling had a clear rhythm to it. his spite became a song. he was the first one to get a nickname too. i called him the grizzled one. he looked like he'd been through hell. probably because he had. age only emphasized the hurts he'd endured. but he didn't let them break him. a year ago, when we barely knew each other, he spent more than two hours here. he didn't eat a thing. he just sat on the fence. studied the sky and everything it held in its thrall. he stayed until all the light was gone. i wasn't sure what that meant at the time. now i think he was telling me he was in it for the_long_haul. i hope i get to see his beautiful scowl again. 230910 what's it to you? who go blather from