refrigerator raze i caught this brutally depressing documentary on public television last night. it was about a man who moved back home to guelph to help his father and his other brother with the family business, which was a strip club. the father was a fascinating, odious character. he was an obese ocean of a bully. the odd redeeming quality would swim to the surface every_so_often, only to be swallowed up again as quickly as it had appeared. it was clear to him that his business was eroding his family. he didn't care. he liked being the big boss man. he wasn't going to let that get away from him. while he was stuffing his face with food, his wife, the daughter of holocaust survivors, was starving herself. she had been for some time. it was amazing she was still alive. she was a flesh-covered middle-aged skeleton. her arms and legs were frail twigs. she wore wigs, because her hair was falling out. her teeth were brittle from years of malnutrition. all the abuse her body had suffered was etched deep into her sunken face. she did everything for everyone else. she was an afterthought even to herself. the son who came home tried to help. there was only so much he could do. her husband wouldn't pay for a single therapy session. he pulled out the old "you can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped" line when he didn't have a clue what his wife wanted. his idea of encouragement was telling her she could move to toronto and kill herself there if she wanted to. that way he wouldn't have to be around when it happened. some people seem to have been born without the ability to differentiate between "tough love" and cruelty. her husband did do one thing for her at the end of the film, to show how much he cared. he bought her a new fridge. 130905 what's it to you? who go blather from