here_is_where_i_am_right_now Anna_Began In a room with robin's egg blue walls. There are ecru curtains with little spindels of brown laced through them. John Lennon is everywhere. So is naked Jennifer Aniston which would probably make me jealous if it weren't inciting this rattling bisexual experimentation thing that is always just below the surface anyway. Depleted Starburst and sticky honey packets which didn't work out exactly as expected litter the deskside and, unassumingly, there my earrings and necklace sit, removed just before bed as if in four nights this coul have become ritual. Tomorrow I'll be packing. The feel of everything; the softened penguin sheet, the unfluffied pillows, the scrape of the carpet and the "tat-tat" my bare feet make on the kitchen floor will be burned into my memory and once again I will berate myself on the way home for not snapping more pictures. Nicole, I'm sorry I didn't make it out there (unless I do in fact drop by tomorrow) but know that on my visit to the east side I was excited to see EE Sane and yu were thought of and like this always goes, the days were just suddenly over with not enough time to focus on breathing. There were times, sitting on the pier, the ticking slowed and I pushed away home and fields in Cooperstown and ongoing nightmares and trial dates and saw the stars and the world with clarity. This is where I am. Sitting criss-cross on my kissy boy's bed, with burning feet and sore eyes. I am beneath a ceiling fan and it's soothing rattle and tonight I was someone that saw a shooting star and couldn't think of anything more I could possibly wish for. This is where I am. I am in Milwaukee and I am thinking about how complicated starting over really would be. I am here, right now, and I am going back there tomorrow. I almost said home, and then I didn't. 030728 what's it to you? who go blather from