socal Bespeckled I always think in the back corners of my mind that I'll move back there someday very, very soon. To the sunshine, warmth, UV rays bronzing my skin as they did throughout my whole life. The sun peeking through the fronds of the palm trees as I sit in University Village sipping my jamba juice Wearing white shorts and my jean jacket -- but always having to take off the jacket after a few minutes. Looking down at my red toenails in my silver flip flops ... pushing down on the accelerator ... cruising down PCH lost in swirling heavy summer thoughts. Driving down PCH is a feeling I've never felt, even driving to the Cape. Knowing there's a paradise at the end of the road going to the Cape ... but on the PCH, paradise lines the road. You can't escape paradise on PCH. Like the universe it always was, is and always will be. Infinite nirvana. Looking over at a red light and seeing surfboards stacked on top of VW Bugs. The girls cross the street in bikini tops and guys carry their boards on their heads. Lying on my towel in the sun on the sand, feeling close to heaven. Digging my toes in to a warm sandy bed. Ready to do it all over again. Elbow hanging out the window, "We'd blister in the sun, we couldn't wait for night to come, to hit that sand and play some rock n' roll ..." And I think about the likelihood. The likelihood of marrying you ... the likelihood of the East Coast. The likelihood of Connecticut - my destiny? A great state, a great place ... ideal to raise children and have a home and dogs and a beautiful life. Things I want. But I always turn my head and see the ocean. I always close my eyes and feel the sun. I always glance behind and feel the surf break. How can I let that go? 090310 ... cr0wl ventura, santa barbara, ojai, casitas springs, oak view, carpinteria, rose valley...our old stomping grounds. 090311 ... gja All socal was in this part of the world was a category / label for pretend chilled guitar music with self concious self deprecating and therefore vain lyrics song by trustafarians with abs. 090312 ... gja is correcting ...lyrics SUNG by... 090312 what's it to you? who go blather from