heavy slothisily too heavy to comprehend [instead i lifted the clouds and watched the sky sink into oblivion] 051114 ... nom accordion, but it's fun 051125 ... unhinged like a big rock sitting on my chest 151107 ... neoncrackle it's time to let some of these stories rest it's time to put them out to bleach in the sun why does a lifetime get chalked up to an experience 220222 ... tender_square "you've carried me all this time," i said, formulating my goodbye as i stood up from her couch. "there's no way i could've gotten through all of this without you." in our twelve years of therapy, dr. alice helped me through two divorces, two affairs, my mother-in-law's cancer diagnosis and death, the abrupt end of a ten-year friendship, sobriety, a new vocation in writing, two graduate programs (one of which was aborted), moving out of state, moving back in state, moving back to canada, my siblings and their twenty years of countless relapses and bullshit, and my dad's alzheimer's diagnosis, just to name the headlines. "you say that i carried you but not once have you ever felt heavy," she told me. "i admire the way you handle all that has happened. it's been a privilege to watch you grow." 230203 what's it to you? who go blather from