the_fine_art_of_selfdestruction this should be rillian what you do when you're alone. 040424 ... unhinged is not something unlearnable; a big deep blackhole, continuously falling, no ground to stand on. and we took pointers from each other. i'm still being sucked through the vacuum without you, which makes all this that much more miserable, even though the blades have learned to stay put away. new pipes and tins and plastic yellow perscription bottles, air freshener, lighters, incense, screens. i lock myself in my tiny bathroom now and when i tumble out i can't figure out if the smell has seeped out into the apartment or it's just me that smells. paranoid, tweak, alone, now i don't have anything without you. i wanted desparately to be away, a four year wish, and now that i'm back to the same, i wish i was there with you. i want to call you. what do i do now? living alone can make a crazy person even more crazy. 040424 ... crOwl square the circle 050221 what's it to you? who go blather from