please_stop Sonya It's apparent that you don't care about who you hurt... You say you've been alone since she left. That just goes to show how meaningless it all was to you, even with me being there. 3 years...gone. I will never be able to make another snow turtle without breaking down in tears. I can only pray that you're happy with how things are, because you wanted it this way. I can only hope you're happy with who you're currently entangled with....though I know that's glaringly not true. If you ever loved me like you so claimed, you would understand my pain, but you don't. You want someone who would lay everything down at your feet... I gave up all of it for you and that still wasn't enough. Please stop. You tear me up inside still to this day..and you won't get the opportunity to hear me say this to you because something in me tells me it would fall on deaf ears, because I don't believe you really cared the way you so proclaimed. I am left thinking it was all a bunch of nonsense uttered on your part so you wouldn't have been alone. During Saudi, afterwards, all of it. Perhaps I should have listened to them when they were telling me you really didn't love me. They seem to know you best, don't they? Wishing we could be friends but your actions and total lack of realization for my feelings make it impossible. I always did love you, but it didn't mean a thing. It's for the best to keep your name on a list and out of my reach. I'm sorry. 051025 what's it to you? who go blather from