it_hurts fallen the emotions...cradled within...swirling still...the repetition of dream your blinking eyes so much of me still craves you.....our scheduled doses of each other.......still craved there are no more doses i want to bleed for you....our breath to meet as one... where are you? what happened? how can I be o.k. ....o.k. again? so much of me wants you....wants to find the balance so much knows the danger.....the repulsion of that desire...knows the hearbreak....knows the resulting wounds....knows the loss....fears the cradled desire of you... the love....oh the love... you once taught this to me.....only to rip......rip.....pull......and tug it away tell me....teach me....how do I stop wanting to share the love with you......the love you showed me......the doors you opened?....please tell me...... please please you will never hold me ....never again... is it a weakness?....a weakness of mine......this longing for you 020202 ... fallen this other part of me...yet still all the assembled pieces i miss the revelling debauchery the other side of the coin the house cat on the sofa....not really a cat....but adored as one the always warm bed where are all the beautiful lovers of days gone by?....why can I not find any fit to wear those shoes?... mmmmm the deep throated howls at the moon....the dancing........the hunt not only has the magic ticket been lost.........but so has this will somebody please come lay on my altar?...will somebody please show me I still know the way?......and yes the true secret is......i still know the way.....i just need new eyes to show me i want to taste your blood.......yes yours.....no, we have not met yet.....i want to taste your tears, your sweat...see your writhing form...i want to quench my wily spirit with your electric touch... i will bend you to my will......as long as you let me you can bend me to yours.....i will let you......as long as it is fun......a bit messy........moist.... we can share hidden fingertip_tracings . ..we can giggle...let me see your hidden smile.......be my mona lisa maybe you can be the one to sate me....mmm maybe maybe you won't be the one to grow to detest me...where are you? 020202 ... jess jess likes it when it hurts *sings* i like pleasure spiked with pain and music is my aeroplane, its my aeroplane... 020406 ... blue sharpie kiss it 020717 what's it to you? who go blather from