disillusion tail-devouring snake If once I fell in love with you your wide open skies your gorgeous mountain pink at sunset, filling up the sky like all those balloons in October. If once I swooned over you your rich culture, spicy foods and diverse history still living and healing to this day. If there was one moment, or two, where I felt the promise of a city awakening, These moments are gone. I am lonely while inside you, my little big city. I eat your food and I am starving for nutrients. The poverty and generations of lack suck out all the clean air, replaced with bitterness and desperateness. I am doing my best to integrate and belong in a city that tells me my skin is the wrong color, my heritage is not welcome, I do not know the right people to succeed. The invisible strings of nepotism leaves my family stranded to your whims. The desert landscape that once looks vibrant with life, is now arid and plain. The plains, the acres of shrubs and homes for birds are hidden beneath endless cookie-cutter HOA homes. I came here with hope I leave a shadow of myself You, Albuquerque, have sucked me dry I am a shell, empty I have lost trust in people I fear for my life and those I love every time we set foot outside every time we drive. Reckless, Ignorant Selfish, Violent Your children piss in the waters that could carry us all forward. 170122 ... three monther . 170123 what's it to you? who go blather from