dancing_in_the_dragon's_jaws raze i gave you a movie to watch. you gave me some music to listen to. i never got the movie back. i only watched it once when it was still mine. i had to turn the volume down until i could hardly hear a thing. that's how late it was. not that it mattered much. i wouldn't have understood what anyone was saying anyway. the dialogue was in swedish. there were subtitles at the bottom of the screen, but sometimes you want to feel the way someone's voice bends and breaks. even if they're speaking a language you'll never begin to learn. it wasn't a horror film. it played like one for me. the loss of your own identity is a heavy stone to sit with. one shot made me so uncomfortable i almost turned the tv off. you would know the scene if you saw the movie. but you didn't. you kept what wasn't yours until you forgot it was anyone's. i found a way to hold onto what didn't belong to me before it made its way back to you. i burned myself a copy of the album you let me borrow and wrote what i needed to know on the white face of what i'd already paid for. i was never crazy about the one song everyone knows even if they haven't heard the whole thing. i liked the deep cuts no one ever talks about. especially the one that bleeds these words when you pull it apart: un rire sonne comme le cristal. dans le ciel vide, quelqu'un danse comme une flamme. soft hands slapping at a conga drum. piano rushing in like a waterfall. pretty from a distance. lethal up close. the other night i pulled it out for another listen. not the copy i made from the cd you gave me. the record i bought myself for five bucks fifteen years ago. halfway through the second side, i learned everyone else's favourite song is now my favourite too. time has twisted it into something easier to love. one of these days we're gonna sail away. and i'm wondering where the lions are. 230204 what's it to you? who go blather from