power ondele Dressed to kill we guessed you might Friend or foe or family We'll sacrifice the Virgin white Her death will be the life of me Power now is all the rage Don't excuse it use it well Keep the lion in his cage Free from hunger, free from hell -Orzabal 010126 ... death mental dual action room-os Something's coming... (A. Carlson - 4/17) 010416 ... Cicero right hand pulses raw strength left hand steady tranquil with purpose two deft vehicles of doom ready for their destiny 030217 ... Bespeckled Love. 071105 ... no reason parents want to tell me what to do and how to be and boss tells me what to do and how to be and when so many people want to have power over you it's hard not to be angry and/or shrink in a corner. i could refuse to let them except i am dependent on them monetarily. 130113 ... raze it goes out, leaves you standing in the black void, the sound of thunder stealing it away, and you think, well, at least i've got a good flashlight. three seconds later it's back on, the thunder loses its nerve, and you're almost a little sad not to have to stumble around the house lighting your own way. 160315 ... tender_square i relayed to my analyst that my ex is on the verge of dating the woman he is interested in. "it makes me feel...replaceable," i said. "and i know that when that happens i will have to step aside and give him space because i don't want to be the one impeding on that." my analyst remarked that i was being charitable. my mouth curved into a funnel cloud. "i'm tired of being charitable. i'm tired of letting him off the hook," i said. my analyst called my ex a puer aeternus, not ready for a woman, forever wanting to be mothered but resenting it all the same. "why did you feel you had to 'work so hard'?" he asked. "could it be that your desire to change others could have shadow motivations?" and the layers snapped into focus, how even beneficence is a way of harnessing my own power; if i can change a man i love for the better, isn't that evidence of just how capable i am? "and if this other woman steps in and is able to do what i couldn't..." i trailed. "it would mean to you that she has amassed an energy you weren't able to and that would be quite the blow to your femininity as you understand it." 230718 what's it to you? who go blather from