wounded_by_must unhinged my workload is killing me. a couple of months ago i met a boy that i can write music with. another thing to add to the list. i don't want to give him up. i have no new students coming in (even though it is the main time of year for new students to sign up) so i have to work more hours than i want to at the shitty retail job i hate. i have to squeeze him in. my anxiety creeps up. my cravings for nicotine increase to the point that second hand smoke smells enticing again. (i think of the fact that if i were to have a brain hemorrhage i don't have a husband to save my life like my mother did and my desire to smoke cigarettes again diminishes). i cry in the shower. i cry when i meditate. my heart is a wound again. my shambhala_training takes over. breathe_in breathe_out life goes on whether i want it to or not 151006 ... flowerock You write so well, your music must be beautiful too... is it possible to find a more enjoyable job to get the same or better paycheck? Having enjoyable coworkers and work environment can be a world of difference. 151007 what's it to you? who go blather from