of_course this should be rillian what would happen if we really understood? nobody understands. maybe we had these momentary glimpses, but that's it. these tiny, brief seconds when the velvet curtain is pulled back and we peek inside the secret glory. this is not like when toto revealed the the wizard's true identity. that was fucking fake. this is you... alone. by yourself. one on one. you and your god. what do you hear? what do you say? what will you do? rest for now. sleep. for in dreams we visit the lands we used to live in. we all want to be a part of something. we all want to make music, even if it is the sound our lips make when air passes through them. (whistle?) we all want someone to look at us when we are speaking. to smile when we say something we think is funny. you are me. i am you. don't even fucking try to dispute that. 031231 ... . . 090209 ... unhinged i woke up this morning aching to have someone to reach out to, a face to touch, lips to kiss. the sunshine has given way to big fat grey clouds that seem about to burst at any second. 090209 what's it to you? who go blather from