canine raze i used to dream about dogs a lot. dogs i'd never seen before. all different breeds. in most of those dreams the dogs would attack me. they would gnaw on my hands and i would try and fail to free myself. i never worked out the symbolism. i need my hands to make music. maybe it had something to do with a fear of losing that part of my identity, even back then. fourteen years ago, i had a dream i was in this place that looked like an abandoned warehouse. i was with another person. a stranger. there was a shorthaired black dog standing in the front right corner of the room. the stranger leaned a broken door against the wall to trap the dog. the dog had been abused. i could hear it in the way he growled. the stranger left without saying anything. it was just the two of us. i was afraid, but i forced myself to walk toward the door. the dog snapped every time he heard me move. i grabbed the door and threw it out of the way. i set him free. he stopped growling. he became my friend. he followed me everywhere i went. i didn't know where we were going, but i knew we would be together, and that gave me comfort. after that, most of the dogs i saw in my dreams made a point of letting me know they were allies. i don't think any of them ever tried to hurt me again. now i dream of dogs i know from my waking life. charlie. tali. cricket. last night cricket ran circles around me the same way tali does. her movements were more deliberate than tali's, her body slowed by canine arthritis, but she wanted to show me the puppy that still lived in her heart. maybe this is what happens when you step_into_fear. you find love on the other side. 211209 what's it to you? who go blather from