self_sabotage nr i could never get a complete handle on why people would do this. but now i realize it's because, if you're not used to a lack of sabotage, how do you know what to trust? 220212 ... epitome of incomprehensibility Guilt can play a role too. It's not always overt for me, but I think that's one reason why I avoid and delay things. 220213 ... tender_square "you know mary had an interesting take on your sister's job," mom said. "she keeps saying it's her dream position and that without the car she can't continue to do it. after trying to get her my car days ago with this agreement to no avail, mary wondered if the car is being used as an excuse to leave the job, that the role has become too much for your sister to maintain. and that instead of recognizing that and her limitations, she's blaming it on an external factor as a form of self-sabotage." 230213 ... raze he admitted he went out of his way to complicate things. he put himself in bad situations and made himself miserable so he'd have something to write about. i wanted to grab him by whatever arm he was least likely to hit me with and ask him why. why poison things when all you need to do is be awake in your own life? trouble will find you all on its own. 230214 what's it to you? who go blather from