fizzle_and_fade
raze
i
don't
know
which
of
the
twins
was
speaking
.
but
this
is
what
she
said
: "
i
tend
to
be
someone
who
is
obsessed
with
memory
.
almost
like
a
memory
hoarder.
i
keep
trinkets
and
little
souvenirs
of
places
i've
gone
that
are
not
physical souvenirs
but
more
just
tucked
away
into
the
creases
and
crevices
of
my
brain
.
i
love
audio
files —
literal
audio
files
of
places
i've
gone
and
the
little
soundbites
of
what
it
was
like
when
i
was
there
.
the
visuals
of
maybe
people
-sketching,
or
just
really
trying
to
take
in
what
it
was
like
to
be
sitting
there
in
that
moment
.
for
some
reason
it
becomes
an
obsession
,
keeping
track
of
the
actual occasion.
and
i
think
it's
really
hard
for
me
to
let
go
and
be
okay
if
my
brain
forgets
every
detail,
or
if
it
distorts
the
actual
event
.
it's
human
to
be
someone
who
wants
to
remember
,
especially
in
this
digital
age
.
at
the
same
time
,
it's
interesting
,
because
i've
noticed
the
past
couple
of
years
i've
had
a
marked
shift
in
trying
to
make
sure
i
*
don't
*
remember
some
things
.
i
really
don't
want
to
remember
certain
feelings
and
things
that
have
happened
.
i
haven't
written
in
my
journal
in
a
really
long
time
.
and
i
look
back
and
i
think
that's
just
so
weird
.
it's
not
even
an
acceptance
of
memory
being
something
outside
of
myself
.
it's
more
an
all
-or-nothing
i
have
with
memory
.
and
i
think
i
just
need
to
learn
to
accept
the
continual
presence
of
it
,
and
remember
that
it's
okay
for
things
to
fizzle
and
fade
."
230819
what's it to you?
who
go
blather
from
