compatible tender_square the artist asked, "why did the two of you divorce?" she interrogated us from her easel's stool. he and i were seated beside one another on her mid-century modern sofa, searching one another's faces and squirming. "well, it was good," he said. "but then a bunch of stuff happened with our families and it changed things." i nodded my confirmation, hands clasped before me. "so you let the outside break down what you had?" "not exactly," he stammered. "there were other things that contributed to it." "but you're so compatible," the artist gushed. i spoke up. "well, we've done a lot of work to process this," i explained. "and we get along now because the pressure of being a couple isn't there anymore." "you never know," the artist leaned in close and conspiratorially. "you may end up getting back together." it's a common theme i've been bashed with from well-meaning elders who have more marital experience. that, and hearing that i'd realize how silly i'd been with taking sides that mean everything now and wouldn't matter later. when he and i were alone again i pressed him. "don't those questions ever bother you?" "not at all," he said. "i know what i experienced, the feeling that showed me it was time to move on." "i guess that's the difference between us," i mused. "i'm soooo influenced by externals when i know this is really about being secure in my choices." 230602 what's it to you? who go blather from