gawker tender_square a few days ago she sent a well-meaning message with good wishes for the new year. she wondered if the two of us might connect in future, adding that she often thought of me. i took twenty-four hours to respond, writing that i was in the midst of big life changes—divorce and moving back to my country of origin. "it's the end of an era," i wrote, in reference to leaving a city that has come to define much of my adult life. i've been doing this back-and-forth between-the-borders thing for five months now, i'd realized, with more to go. the longer it takes for her to respond (and what exactly am i hoping for from her, pity? acknowledgement? surprise?) the more i feel like she's gawking at the scene of an accident, either too stunned to say anything of comfort or thanking god it isn't her. 230120 what's it to you? who go blather from