wtf_am_i_doing
snook I really have no idea. About to drastically try to change my life because up to now it's just not working. No safety net. If it could have been fucked up, I fucked it up, royally. At this age I should be married and have kids. I know it's useless to compare, everyone is different. I don't even want kids or marriage right now! I am at least quitting my soul sucking job working for the devil of all evil corporations. Trying to go to school full-time so it doesn't take me 8 years to get a damn bachelors. Single for the first time in almost 9 years and hating it. I shouldn't have broken up with him. And now I think it's too late to go back. Not sure if I'm afraid I'm dying or if I'm terrified of life. WTF? 100930
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re_alisma you're making transitions.

except that you might be doubting yourself because of a Venus cycle. i would advise you to sit on your hands till the middle of November, and then you'll feel much better and more inspired to use them again. you, and all of us, might currently have clouded judgment concerning what we perceive to be The Good Life. demand "better" inspiration, but that doesn't necessarily mean changing what you thought out before this whole retrograde process started a few weeks ago. i'm not an expert on astrology, though. if you don't want to buy any half-baked astrology, my 2 cents friend-on-the-fake-phone advice is to just wait until you feel better about it (the evil job), which you will. if you are meant to get back together with 9-years, you will.
100930
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snook Transitioning is a much better way to think about it instead of giant scary life changes. Doubting is something I have always had a talent for. I genuinely appreciate your 2-cents. The only reason not working for the devil anymore is scary is because of the whole paycheck thing. I've decided money and possessions aren't what make me happy though. So big middle finger to them. I'll also be distancing myself from some bad friendships and people who work there. As far as 9 years, it was two relationships spanning 9. And I'm 25. I do hope your right, and whatever is meant to be, will be.
Que Sera, Sera, and thank you.
100930
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n o m feeling a little depressed 101001
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lostgirl swimming upstream in a downward spiral....

ever feel like you're in the giant toilet bowl of life after it just dumped shit all over you?

so, yeah, WTF is right.
101001
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s_e_m_i_n_o_l electric_moment
carnifex hurried peeling of clothing
grasping hands
salt taste of sweat on skin
click of intimately placed piercing jewel against the front of my teeth
manicured nails digging into my hair, pushing my head down, lightly perfumed thighs holding me in place until she whispers "comeuphereandfuckme...nowww"

and i happily comply 100930
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unhinged mamihlapinatapai


weird how
when you looked at me that day
your eyes were all i could feel
the entropy_paste of all the drugs you did
usually covered it up
but that day
when you looked at me
i saw some emotion pass your face


not the practiced indifference
(believe me;
i know the difference)
but the same pain
that stopped me heart
made my skin itch
when you weren't around


your blue eyes
crackled in the winter
ice
snow

and i could tell by the way you moved
when you crossed the street
that there weren't words in our language
to say it 100930
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unhinged *my 100930
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lostgirl electric_feel 101001
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s_e_m_i_n_o_l w_h_o
. estimates 3Bln deaths and codex_alimentarius you must have poison on your food for_your_safety. clean and non_gmo food is no longer allowed. 100928
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PISSED!!!!!!!!!!!! AWWWW FUCK WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS. This is EVIL!! 100929
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PISSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They can't MAKE people eat GMO food this is in not_for_my_safety FUCK W_H_O! 100929
...
. . 101001
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s_e_m_i_n_o_l electric_feel
lostgirl heart_pounding

how could that one dream practically scare the life out of me? 101001
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. mgmt 101001
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s_e_m_i_n_o_l wtf_are_you_screwing
. omgwtfruok? 101001
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Strideo not what but who.
and no one at the moment.
it's hard to type and screw.
... 101001
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snook My brains, MY BRAINS!!!!! or maybe YOUR BRAINS!!!! out 101001
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s_e_m_i_n_o_l
oh_my_god_what_the_fuck_are_you_ok
. omgwtfruok 101001
...
. . 101005
...
. s_e_m_i_n_o_l 101005
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. omgwtfruok s_e_m_i_n_o_l 101005
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s_e_m_i_n_o_l s_e_m_i_n_o_l 101005

what's it to you?
who go blather
from 101005

what's it to you?
who go blather
from 101005

what's it to you?
who go blather
from 101005

what's it to you?
who go blather
from 101005

what's it to you?
who go blather
from
101005
what's it to you?
who go
blather
from