deb so many thoughts
don't know where to begin

things here are so
than i thought they might be
at this point...

1 kid,
another on the way

some days i wonder what might have happened
i had done things another way
if i had said something
when i had the chance
if i would be here right now
if i hadn't done this or that...

all the questions burning
in the back of my mind
as i sit here
depressing myself with music

but really,
even IF
things would be different
had i taken a different turn
back then...
would i want to change all this?
would i want to give up this life?

that beautiful blonde child asleep...
the little one kicking away in his
custom-made coccoon....
this glittering thing upon my finger
and the man it links me to forever?

no, i don't think i would change a thing.
i couldn't imagine my life
without him..
without that little girl...
without the future that i know is ahead

its just been a long day
i guess
sunlight peering through miniblinds
giving me a headache

all the ifs
all the maybes
but none of them ARE.
none of them were MEANT to be, apparently
and i'm sure i'm better off
not ever having the opportunity to know

and still... it just makes you wonder...
somepeoplesmile I DONT WANT THINK ABOUT THEM ANYMORE. 040825
my name it means nothing Is this what 18 is supposed to be like? 090602
what's it to you?
who go