softgreyblanket
unhinged
i
think
his
affects
on
me
have
worn
off
.
because
in
the
back
of
my
mind
there
was
always
,
wait
there
still
is
,
guilt
for
how
i
treated
him
.
even
more
after
i
finally
figured
out
how
much
he
meant
for
me
.
i
heard
one
of
the
most
beautiful
performances
of
my
life
the
other
day
and
all
i
could
do
was
think
of
him
and
the
night
we
spent
by
the
fountain
and
it
made
me
cry
.
ever
since
i
have
felt
my
softgreyblanket
of
sweet
familiar
depression
settle
back
on
my
shoulders
.
the
defining_charateristic
i
thought
was
gone
just
came
back
in
a
low
pressure
system
.
i
feel
like
i'm
leaving
something
important
behind
in
milwaukee
.
that
i'm
different
but
still
the
same
.
i
haven't
cried
like
i
did
today
for
a
long
time
.
the
kind
where
i
sit
on
the
bed
,
put
a
pillow
in
my
lap
,
and
bring
my
knees
into
my
face
and
just
scream
into
the
pillow
.
where
does
that
all
come
from
anyway
?
i
had
been
relatively
happy
after
we
had
our
time
together
.
maybe
it
came
back
because
i
finally
figured
out
how
much
he
did
for
me
.
the
last
time
i
cried
like
that
he
was
holding
me
telling
me
he
would
always
be
there
for
me
.
and
i
want
to
try
again
with
him
.
but
part
of
me
wants
him
to
want
to
be
just
friends
so
that
i
can
be
punished
for
what
i
did
.
i
have
this
thing
for
cruel
and
unusual
punishment
.
it's
the
inferiority
complex
coming
back
stronger
than
ever
.
soon
i
will
be
home
and
i
will
be
more
the
nicole
i
was
last
summer
.
suicidal
with
knife
marks
at
her
wrist
.
looks
like
nothing
much
has
changed
in
a
year
.
damn
the
man
that
said
all
his
life
was
a
circle
.
i
don't
like
this
circle
i'm
stuck
in
.
010726
...
celestias shadow
i'm
...so....tired....*snuggle* snore....
031022
what's it to you?
who
go
blather
from
