shame kyla This morning, I found I couldn't squash a beetle without first apologizing to it. 040427 ... native persimmon I can't understand why I invited you to visit- I must have known after paying for dinner you'd reserve the right to tease out my anguish only so that you might call me frivolous and guffaw. I can't understand why you would belittle what you claim as your own creation, nor quite how you can love me but not what I am, or how, when we share so little, impatience is in equal parts and spread all around. 061009 ... kerry sometimes i think i should quit calling her because when i do she says “call your father he misses you” i say “the last time we spoke he seemed to think everything was fine” she sighs and says that my hunch is probably right but it isn’t a hunch, i don’t think it is like peeking under a rock, seeing what you can’t unsee and what’s done cannot be undone, what’s said cannot be unsaid what could have happened now never will i want to ask things of him he can’t deliver he says in his brittle voice "sorry i’m not the person you want me to be" i could say the same to you (and sometimes i do) yeah it’s a shame, a crying shame 210813 ... tender_square "shame derives its power from being unspeakable. that's why it loves perfectionists--it's so easy to keep us quiet." brené brown, "daring greatly" 230329 what's it to you? who go blather from