morbid j_blue i am, i talk about loved ones dying casually i think about it plainly, i can rationalize why, but that doesnt explain why its unusual that its unusual is my proof that i am morbid i hate it, it makes me wonder more about myself, why am i this way? 010619 ... nocturnal I have thought about death since I was a little girl. most girls can say that about their wedding day, but I've always thought about death. my own, my friends', my family's; death in general. I used to wonder who or what would change if I died at any given moment. would anything be worse off? I'd wonder about when I would die, where, how, who would be there. I still do from time to time. I never really considered it morbid, though. more like curiosity. but now that I think about it, I guess it is a bit morbid. if someone's away and I don't hear from them as I expected, I wonder if they're dead. that's always the first thought that enters my mind. then I get to considering how I would react and how I would change if I heard that whoever it was really is dead. I don't get scared or worried, I just wonder. 010619 ... splinken there was a kid in my geometry class named aladdin. he used to turn around and rest his elbow on top of my desk. one time he turned around and said: "i'm in a christian heavy metal band. morbid obsession. want to come see us play?" and i said: "no." once, he put his mouth against my friend's mouth and blew cigarette smoke into it. she liked him. i moved away. a year went by and i asked someone what happened to aladdin. he died, in some typically unfair way. 010620 ... inferiority_complex when i cross the street i picture myself getting hit by a car, or a rig, or something i get a close up of my face, and i wonder if my face would split open anywhere as it gets squished or what sometimes when i am holding a knife in my hands, i picture it dropping and falling on my foot blade down, and i wonder what it would feel like is managed sanity like managed health care? 010620 ... guitar_freak black is darkness morbid feels like darkness darkness is beautiful 011114 ... misstree a wonderful category for poetry... the visceral, the morbid, the meat of the matter, so to speak. 011114 ... psychobabe my mom was so pissed at me one day that she screamed "damnit! why are you so fucking morbid!" all because of my confirmation. 011122 ... alice guitar_freak ...i like how you think. 020406 what's it to you? who go blather from