unhinged reverberating to the point of amplification
the way the trees amplified
the violence of the storm

the night we were sleeping together on the futon
and the storm scared me
being next to you
afraid you might overdose in your sleep
scared me
and the lightening and thunder seemed right outside the window
the house shook
i screamed
you told me to shut up

or a different him
telling me i was stupid for having an emotional reaction
to his criticisms of the way i handled my life
like i shouldn't have taken it personally
that he told me i was lazy and irresponsible
(and then on top of that stupid !!!)

don't cry
don't be afraid
don't give up
don't get sick
don't stop
don't feel
don't be afraid
don't cry

from an emotionally repressed father that always pointed out what i shouldn't be doing to one emotionally repressed man after another pointing out what i wasn't doing

my heart is always on
(he told me i should always give 110%)
the spigot is broken
i cry
i am afraid
i give up
i don't have that kind of fight in me
to stem a flood
things crack that i cannot repair

you seem like you need
what i've got
unhinged my violin
the wooden box that amplifies my soul
unhinged (sometimes
as i look at myself in the mirror
getting ready for work

the tears just fall out)
what's it to you?
who go