innerviews_misstree_ripples frAnk and the ripples you have created have spread to me... your definition of hedonism is contagious and inspiring. very cool, i really liked it, especially how you are able to find "some of the most important revelations in the middle of a chaotic environment, watching patterns dance, and riding the moment." well said. and so, as i "jump and prance and seek out the juicy center of each moment," what can i expect to really *feel*? by the way, your tattoo is sharp, well defined, unique, original, and very beautiful. 020319 ... misstree *blush* aww, thanks, both for telling me that my ramblings have touched and the compliment on the tat... what to expect when riding the moment? you've felt it before. everyone has, by different names. epiphanies are the strongest of them. some call them Moments. the ones that stick out in your mind. it's like an orgasm of experience, building up to one snapshot that never leaves you. still pretty vague, huh? i do that sometimes. when I was living in new orleans, when every night was as thick and hot and wild as spurting blood, i really realized that i live like a poet. (gee, imagine that :P ). to drink deep of life, to open yourself to the full spectrum of experience--the highs will be really high, but the lows will almost break you. example. love affairs. arguably the most joyous and painful things a human can go through. now, keep in mind that it takes a lot of strength and balance, and a firm hand on the rudder to survive this kind of life. don't do it halfway. leave every emotional defense behind. keep bandages handy, 'cause you'll need them--but words are very good for that. find someone who entrances you. best is someone who's halfway interested in you back--but only halfway. that way you can have both ends at once--the joy of union, and the pain of distance. DON'T DRAMA. important, difficult. don't stalk, don't drag in others. but privately obsess, and then privately hate, rinse, repeat. taste every second of it. do things for beauty. all the time. walk into a sunset, and don't think of laundry or homework or money, just soak it in. do things you normally wouldn't. instigate if you must, but try to have someone else to blame afterwards. drag a few people into a shower with you at a party, 'specially if there's techno music, a strobe light, some blue tube lights... yeah. um. i never did that. *blink blink* make stories. don't make them up, but say "what the hell?" whenever that little prude on your shoulder tells you you shouldn't. don't do things that are harmful, but if you don't have a good reason not to, then... so, what will you feel? god damn, that's hard to answer. remember hellraiser? how frank (ahem) opened the box because he wanted the ultimate in experience? yeah. kinda like that. only, if you're steering yourself right, more often it'll be laughter than screams, a bounce in your step and a twinkle in your eye instead of hooks and chains in various body parts. and, when things get really bad, and this goes if you're being a hedonist or not, remember that things turn around. sometimes all you can do is hit bottom and push off. but the lows make the highs that much sweeter. and pain beats apathy hands down. one more point, then i go wander (damn i'm loquacious today): You are the Master of your Universe. this ties into the theories behind chaos magic, in a way. whatever you're feeling, it is because you allow yourself to. If your trip gets bad, grab it by the balls and take it somewhere else. if you can't make it happy, make it nothing, and wait for the next wave. I can't stress this enough. Thou art God, brother. Don't let the bastards get you down. It's not easy, none of this is easy, true hedonism is a very difficult thing... but it can be done. And, ironically enough, you don't have to go full-tilt into hedonism to have it be a working part of your lifestyle. Keep the "mom" part of your brain working, telling you that fire burns and work pays bills, and that's a good start. Be chill with it. "Nothing is true. Everything is permitted. Do as thou wilt shall be the whole of the law." -Robert Anton Wilson /end novel *grin* 020319 what's it to you? who go blather from