kookaburra because im such a hypocrite.

i rant on and on about how i hate shallow people, forgetting how shallow i am.
i wouldnt date a guy shorter than i am (though there arent many, im only 5'1")
i wouldnt date a guy who wouldnt be accpeted by my peers
i said some bad things about my friends when my other friends were talking about her
i want people to tell me all of their secrets, but i have secrets that i'll never tell a soul
i say bad things about my friends in my head just because im jealous
ive forgotten about one guy cuz i thought i could snag his more popular twin

i am a morally incomprehensible person, who doesn't even know if that phrase makes any sense in this context.
whitechocolatewalrus i can't even make my parents happy. 040620
minnesota_chris tell me about your peers, kooka. 040622
unhinged i always get this sneaking and horrid feeling that every time i open my stupid mouth, i'm on the verge of fucking up something unspeakably good

we are so different
i feel like i couldn't compete
maybe that's just my lack of self_esteem
maybe that's just where my two ends meet
maybe he was just being nice
of course it didn't mean anything
and now i've gone and opened my stupid mouth
fucked up everything
and i am in a rut
of quickly completely falling
and he picked me up out of one
to place me in another
that was namely his
and i want to hug him
and buy him cookies
and just sit in the same room with him
but i'm afraid that's not possible with him
i want him to be my replacement frank
but i'm afraid that's not possible with him
but he's already claimed
as big a chunk of my heart
and he was probably just being nice
as he is nice in general
no special meanings hidden underneath
and i want to just sit with him
for how disappointed i am in myself right now
because the moment i vocalize things
they all turn to shit
all and any things
the moment i say it
it all turns to shit
i can't compete with that
i've been here before
i disappoint me
when i make the same mistake a thousand times
Ps Mjd 21 and inarticulate. 040928
uow all of this time i've had 040929
8 that's it, i'm fired 041021
daxle i should have hurt that guy 041022
.fallen never good enough 050613
skyburst777 stupid ugly fool 050613
Lemon_Soda Only because I am my own greatest critic. I'm my own biggest fan, too. So I guess I fill my expectations out nicely, as well. 050613
neesh more than i can bear 050613
pete the times i probably should be with people are the times im the most unable to function around them 050613
thorn because i can't just pull myself together and talk to people. i need to talk. but i can't bring myself to. i can't deal with other people. and the few people i talk to, are getting tired of me, because i'm so dysfunctional.

i don't know how to explain this. but i really hate myself right now.
unhinged is it that hard to get a job? jesus. and if i can't even get a meaningless job how the hell am i going to come up with one that actually has something to do with my degrees? 050614
a chaotic gift to idealism it was explained well. i know the feeling th

unhinged... degrees mean careers.. careers mean moving somewhere away.
. hey folks, i astound myself, every day (sorry about that!) 050615
unhinged unfortunately, a lot of the careers in the degrees i have have been vanishing ever since fucktard got into office; i might have to move to europe 050615
innocent insect could be so much more, could do so much more.

where is the dancing one, the one with the tongue placed firmly in cheek.

what have I become and why can't I figure it out
nom) could've done today, couldn't do today 051008
unhinged i'm so intent on being miserable that i've chased everyone away 051008
three words i_miss_you_so_much
Doar well Kook,

You have never disappointed me.

what's it to you?
who go