i_am_doing_the_right_thing
unhinged meditate


shamatha
shambhala
110515
...
unhinged inhabit my self

means



walking_away
110515
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unhinged my time at the shambhala center has been important to me in the past couple years. until recently, it was a refuge and place of sanity. there are certain days or talks in particular that stick out in my mind.


maybe it was a saturday morning cafe, maybe it was a training level, but we were asking questions.


'how do i know i am doing the right thing?' in reference to meditation

'cause it feels wrong'


ah_ha






in reference to you
that also holds true


i never had a problem caring about others either. but when i was young, i most often did that at the expense of myself. i've slowly started to grow away from that, but with you so many things went right back to where i started. you put me right back where i started; when my heart was open to helping those that needed it most. before the pain became unbearable and i shut myself off.

but you couldn't follow through.



so i need to take care of myself now; which feels selfish, wrong.

which is how i know it is right
110517
...
unhinged .


i am coming back
to_you
just_the_thought
like cool rain on a hot day
120130
...
unhinged .


by staying
by holding my ground
by telling you the truth
130426
what's it to you?
who go
blather
from