honor_unknown The Outlander I wish I could say that I was dealt a hand of aces when I schlopped out of my mothers womb. However, that was'nt what happened, and as I grew I realized that's the case for most. So, in a way we all learn our own version of honor amongst thieves. We may not be terrible to others, but terribly self serving. We may not be the most giving, but we know when it's most important to act. So I learned how to understand people in my own way and eventually realized that even though I'm too lazy to help myself I'll never feel I've done enough to help others. Now that your gone how do I tell you that in some plutonic way I loved you? How do I honor you so that others will remember the person you were, and how unfair your hand was and the successes you had with it? I've thought long and hard now of having your crest tatooed on my body, so that I will remember you the same way I wish to never forget the other things that have defined my life. I'm so tired of going to funerals and learning more about the one who has passed there than what I knew in life, but in your case the only detail I didn't have was the one that ended yours. But did you know that? After homelessness, death, desperation and resurrection I have learned that the only way we honor those we care for are through the sacrifices we make for them. And what sacrifice can I make now that will let you know how much I really cared, even if you never knew and never will. I can only say now that as a friend and roomate there's no one I'll miss more, and tatoo or not I will find some way to show the world how honorable a person you were, and how much less the world is without you. without rambling too much I only want to say that I can never forget a man who could break anything with a thought, thusly named "Smashy", and still somehow managed to program computers for a living. And with that I'll say I miss you, I love you, and Canis you'll never know how much... 060722 what's it to you? who go blather from