sixteen *dials*


*cellphone beeps*

*removes from ear*

*reads: user busy. retry?*



*oh screw it.*

*sets cell phone down.*
endless desire thank you for calling. i was absolutely exhausted. up til 4. awake at 7. practice for 5 hours. cleaning house for 3. i was about to collaspe. i needed someone to talk to.

haha i didnt mean to answer the phone so meanly (hmm is that a word?) but i thought it was my little brothers friends. they are a bit annoying. so many kids in my family. . .they seem to be popping out of the walls.

i was hoping youd have an answer. hoping you were one of those people had conquered the things that are so hard for me. though, im not sure if you have an answer. and im beginning to be even more sure that the only answers i am going to find are from myself.

do call again sometime.
made my day.
karl the weed im not really a poetic person, so i get sort of jealous of other people when they write poems or songs or things like that... 030613
endless desire haha well there is a difference between writing those kind of things and writing them well. it is like having long hair. you can have long hair, but there is no point unless you have 'beautiful' long hair. if your hair doesn't look good long or becomes unhealthy there is no point in growing it long in the first place. but then again, the health of one's hair is often matter of opinion and often one does not know if their hair will look good long or not. right now i am growing my hair long and i am not sure if i will like it when i am done. i don't know if write good poetry or not so i am trying. ((you miss 100% of the shots you never take--yes cliche but true)) it is all the risk. and it seems that as long as a person has something to say to the world, they write good poetry. 030613
eyedream Unfortunately, everyone has something to say about the world. The trick in poetry is to make something redundant and unoriginal that someone in the course of history has already pondered or seen or witnessed or invented, (and probably more deeply), and make it feel new to someone. Even if that someone is yourself. Another cliche. 030613
karl the weed yeah, well i think your poems are good. im more of a deep thought person. i like to ponder the meaninglessness of many of the questions we ask ourselves. "what is the meaning of life?" i hate that question. it angers me every time someone asks it. 030613
god where do you stand on rabbits? 030613
endless desire hmm me or karl?
i personally love rabbits
or more like bunnies
says i like bunnies.
though i never specifically say rabbits.
if i could have any present, i would want a rabbit/bunny. i am just so very allergic to them. i am allergic to absolutely everything. it drives me nuts. my favourite thing about rabbits though, is how quickly they populate. (wink wink) lucky f(uck)ing rabbits. ((in_more_ways_than_one))
x silly! he meant where on the rabbit do you stand... the ears? or what? 030613
endless desire i would never stand on a rabbit. i know that seems absolutely retarded but i can't even the chocolate bunnies at easter. i am not like extra sensitive, i just have this thing with bunnies. the first thing i ever bought with my own money was this pin that said "bunnies are soft" and it had this bunny on it. i just really like bunnies/rabbits. but if i had to stand on a part, it'd be their little cotton tails. ((yeah i know that sounds lame)) 030613
eyedream I too dislike the question of the meaning of life. I don't really understand it. When people ask that, are they asking what our purpose is? As in, why be alive when we end up dying? I don't understand the question at all.

I have a thing with seals, Desire. Sleek, smooth, alive, glittering dark-eyed water creatures.

is spiritual
x why be spiritual if you're not concerned with the meaning of life? 030613
endless desire i don't think she said she isn't 'concerned' with it, but rather that she doesn't understand it. there is a huge difference. whether or not we ((think)) we are concerned with it, does not determine whether or not we ((are)) concerned with it. i think it is inevitable to be concerned with one's purpose unless you are literally sitting around doing absolutely nothing. and as for life's exact meaning, i am not sure if i understand that either. i think the concept itself is silly and cliche and really has nothing to do with whether or not a person spiritual though. but then that leads me to the question, who am i to define spirituality? can any really define spirituality for anyone else? does anyone even know its true definition? help me out here for i am trully curious and maybe even confused. 030614
Eyedream X, I don't like it when people spend their lives worrying frantically about their purpose and never live. To me, the meaning of life is to live. Yes, it's not permanent, because we die, which means it's even more important to live in the first place.

thanks the lovely Desire.
x i don't think i asked you "endless desire" 030614
endless desire would you have had to ask me anyways?
i didn't know you decided when i got to comment on something. hah :)
x i didn't decide, obviously, which is why you were able to 030614
endless desire fine fine you win. but jeez, you don't have to be in such a bad(interesting) mood all the time. x is truly blather's fist. 030614
ferret i prefer my own company, although if you would like to meet me (instead of the other way around) please, come with something useful to say. people are so material 030623
endless desire umm well. im sorry but what are you talking about? 030623
ever dumbening e.d. e. d. just a little heads up: the screen names e.d. and e. d. were taken. and possibly ed and e d, i can't remember. i guess it's really not a big deal. i mean even my girlfriend made the mistake of using a screen name that had already been used. i guess the difference is that she and i are sleeping together, so she gets a little more slack.

oh, and after searching just now, i realized that you already know this. so my question is: why would you continue to use it?

whatever. shit happens.

love peace mugwam jism
endless desire ((never ed)) i don't think i used it again. if i did it was a complete accident. i must have just gotten lazy and forgotten. i just get sick of typing. 030628
endless desire but now my name is all mixed up because i have posted with my email address and without. ayee i'm confused. 030628
User24 I had that problem, first of all I posted name + email, then I changed email address, so it was just name, but on my who page, my old email shows up, I briefly tried name+new email, but found the shorter who list bug, so I I just type my name and nothing else. 030629
endless desire i'm really not sure what's wrong with mine but when i post with name + email, it only gives half my list, but when i do just name, it gives the whole thing. i just feel bad because leaving your email seems like an important part if someone ever wanted to contact you. but then again, i really don't think that's an issue. ;) 030629
kss tonight three of us hung out.
we had dinner, and we drank.
and we drank some more.
then, while we were sitting around
someone said "endless desire" and
we all laughed.

but in a nice way. really.
jane good times... 030722
x :p 030723
kss I really didn't mean that to sound cruel. I mean we just laughed. Somehow blather seems infinitely more stupid when you talk about it in the real world. 030811
endless desire good to know that i'm laughed at by people who don't know me, also.


i'm over it. :)
endless desire you could have always said 'ferret' or 'eyedream' or 'user24'. but no. 030812
IKC 56-80 Ofddly enough, i went for pizza with some friends of mine who know about blather (my_little_secret kinda got out over a scenario like "kweschen" last year) They added an extra large pizza with everything on it (instead of ordering toppings to be put on it, you ask them to leave things out if you don't want them).

Unfortunately, they called it the Super Special.

We changed our minds and ordered Chinese instead
kss actually, after we said "endless_desire" and laughed, someone said "ferret". the laughing stopped, and we all got a little depressed. then we drank more. 030812
ferret i ate a ferret once... errr.... no wait.... ummmm..... PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE MAN BEHIND THE EMERALD GREEN CURTAIN! *pulls an emerald green curtain all around himself* 030812
endless desire so i'm to be laughed at
and ferret is to be depressed over.

well that just makes so much more sense now.
Flowers are you still online?
check your email if so
endless desire i thought i heard someone yell "endless" today and i quickly spun around. the name has really become part of me. i like that. 031013
misstree come dance with me, darling, take deep breaths and shut your eyes and let all else slip away but movement. nothing can touch you when you set yourself away. relax, let go, for i tell you that you are free. i have a basket full of smiles, and one in here is in especially pretty wrapping just for you. 031016
Road Lullaby

Beloved, may your sleep be sound
That have found it where you fed.
What were all the world's alarms
To mighty Paris when he found
Sleep upon a golden bed
That first dawn in Helen's arms?

Sleep, beloved, such a sleep
As did that wild Tristram know
When, the potion's work being done,
Roe could run or doe could leap
Under oak and beechen bough,
Roe could leap or doe could run;

Such a sleep and sound as feel
Upon Eurotas' grassy bank
When the holy bird, that there
Accomplished his predestined will,
From the limbs of Leda sank
But not from her protecting care.

w.b.yeats (1865-1939)
endless desire today was not an easy day for me. we all have our ups and downs, i suppose. . .i just feel that mine are more frequent than i desire. blather seems to sustain me. im dancing, misstree. i'd love to dance away from here. but i doubt im safe anywhere. i wish someone could sit down and tell me how to be ok with myself. to except myself. others have, why can't i? i assumed that by now i would have stumbled upon the answers. im just not sure how much more i can take. just_breathe. 031016
Road Hi endless,

you gave me some attention...actaully lots of big attention....

so here's another poem for you.


An idle poet, here and there,
Looks around him; but, for all the rest,
The world, unfathomably fair,
Is duller than a witling's jest.
Love wakes men, once a lifetime each;
They lift their heavy lids, and look;
And lo, what one sweet page can teach,
They read with joy, then shut the book.
And some give thanks, and some blaspheme
And most forget; but, either way,
That and the Child's unheeded dream
Is all the light of all their day.

Coventry Patmore (1823 - 1896)
sometimes_she is so sick of her name 031212
pobodys nerfect psst! hey endless, regarding blather_card_exchange, see aol_instant_messenger or clicky the name *points to the left* :) 031213
pipedream *leaves a hug*

such a sweetie this one be.
endless desire oh thanks pobody, i've been looking for your email for ages. glad to see you in the blue. i feel like i haven't seen you in ages, but maybe i've just been very unobservant.

blushes awkwardly and slides the tip of right foot around in dirt at pipedreams comment. eep! thank_you. the more i watch out for pipe's blathes, the more i like pipe!

is in a much better mood than she's used to.
whitechocolatewalrus hey endless d, a hey from the me to the you. 031213
pipedream is profoundly grinny at D's comment 031213
Road what happened to the sweet sixteen lass? 040309
jane i was just looking over the blatherskite pictures again. you are quite lovely. your eyes are stunning. but i'm sure you hear that a lot 040309
mon i owe you a card still

leaves a hello
blah-ze there was flowers at the endless desire shrine. it got a bit messy, but some kind of daisy_critter grew up and flowered. i hit it with a shovel.

well! are you happy now?
daisy critter gone rabid i weel haff revenge! rrraarrr!

*brandishes spiky thorn-club and staggers around with big shovel-lump on head, looking for the varmint who hit him/her*
endless desire you guys are strange and lovely. um thank you jane. i thought i ought to say that. i hear it sometimes that im pretty and it always makes me smile. i wonder if those girls who are told all the time how beautiful they are forget how cool it is when one person says that.

my first and only shrine.
Road where did you go endless? 040708
blah-ze the shrine is gone... damn progress

i think my dad tore it down
endless desire hi. im self centered. 040926
whitechocolatewalrus most people are self centered
that doesn't take away the ability to love and be loved
or the ability to be beatiful and lovely like you
jane keeps putting up pictures on myspace
and i'm totally drawn to their yellow lighting
like they're all taken in the afternoon
and she stares back at us like a mona lisa of centemporary times
with the i know something you don't know
and i wonder
if she's coming back
or if she has grown up beyond us,
beyond the blue world.
what's it to you?
who go