casual_sexism
past apparently, if you fill your conversation with a variety of sexist remarks, beliefs, and expectations I will rise to the occasion and berate you loudly and publicly for being a sexist, in particular, and an uncivilized embarrassment to our gender and jack ass, in general. 130616
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unhinged too many terms now, i can't keep up. i'm not a social networker. i don't feel the need to broadcast my status, romantic and otherwise, to strangers. why would i give a fuck if a friend of a friend knows where i went on friday night and who i went there with.



i'm not really into the 50 different shades of being in a relationship. either i am or i'm not. i have had a few casual situations in my life but they never worked out for the good, one or both of us ended up hurt in the end. maybe i'm old_fashioned, traditional, but i think intimacy and sex and all that should just be between two people. it requires too much effort to spread yourself around to several people. if i'm dating you, it's cause i want to know you. i could care less about that other guy i was talking to at the bar, at least in a romantic way. i put my lips on you, i get naked with you, i wake up next to you. i don't need to keep my options open. i'm not trying to keep you separate from the other people and events in my life.


but you don't want to be committed
you wanted to keep me separate from your friends
from the girl you were breaking up with when we got together
from sharing real things with me, feelings, hopes, fears, doubts

so that would lead me to believe that
all our relationship revolved around was
casual_sex
since in your mind
we never got to know each_other properly anyways
( whose fault is that?)


he asked me to have dinner with him
my intuition told me
it wasn't a friendly encounter
you were pissing me off
i was tired of chasing something
when you could have very easily been out chasing something else
since we weren't committed
so i pulled the old eye for an eye
i told him about you
the second time we had dinner
he made a move
kissed me on the balcony
took me to his bedroom
went to cambodia for a wedding
came back and told me he just wanted to be friends


neither one of you seemed to get it
covered it up with
'i've had a crush on you for a long time'
but when it came down to it
you both tossed me out
like so much trash


but that's not supposed to be hurtful
'we weren't on the same page'
'i hope we are on the same page now'


yeah, i get it. i get what page you(s) wanted to be on. you wanted to have sex with me when you had the time but didn't want to be responsible for how that made me feel.

i don't get how anyone thinks that's acceptable. i don't understand how that is truly friendly behavior to use someone for whatever purposes you deem them useful and then put them away in the little box you made for them and labeled 'casual' all the while looking for the_next_big_thing all the while defining what you were doing with them and how it made them feel as no_big_deal and acting surprised when they are hurt and angry.


i'm not gonna stick around to watch you fall in_love with someone else asshole(s)
130618
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unhinged *sigh*


i don't even know anymore. i think it hurts when i am in_love with the person. if i just have some kind of like for them, then they aren't as hard to discard. but either way, discarding others is shitty.



we are comfortable with each_other. we like each_other. we are not ready, independently, for anything serious. so we go to the tea house and taste aged puerh teas. we go for dim sum. we sleep together. we hug goodbye.

we both need a companion to survive the winter. it isn't a fairytale. it isn't a romance novel. but i guess by most accounts it is casual.
140104
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epitome of incomprehensibility Father of friend thinking I wouldn't be interested in stories about gliders (the airplane type) because the "young ladies" would rather talk about something else. Okay. He didn't mean to annoy me though. Maybe I annoy too easily. 140104
...
past in the last week:

the first and third parties in parliament passed a law that severely (and likely unconstitutionally) limit civil liberties but the media is most upset with the leader of the sixth party, the only female leader, who called the cabinet fucking classless for trying to keep a tortured child soldier in prison against international law and human decency. she swore! at a media party! HOW DARE SHE! but our civil liberties? the fucking charter? /who cares!/ fuck you media and your fucking casual sexism and support of repression. who will be able to speak for you, when we're gone?

a female reporter is verbally harassed on camera, she turns on her harasser who claims his mother would die laughing at his "joke." his employer, a crown corporation, fires him. supporters for his sexist douchebaggery come out of the woodwork.

what the hell is wrong with people?
150513
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past people, generally, but a certain (rather dominant or at least vocal) subset of men. i'm ashamed to share elements of anatomy with these people. what the hell. 150513
...
nr i have made the mistake of reading internet comments on the above. it's baffling to me too, and infuriating when people are all, "this is being blown out of proportion; the guys just wanted attention on camera."

1) interrupting someone (of any gender) on tv who's trying to do their job is douchey in itself

2) they still said what they said, and thought it was funny. no amounts of justifying or whitewashing will change that. it's mind-boggling that this phrase has become a meme. beyond being sexist and insulting, it's just stupid and not funny.
150513
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past he looked at me, then turned to her. "sweetheart," he began.

some people are the worst.
160122
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nr ugh. i worked for a few months as a cashier at a hardware store (a long time ago, around 10 years ago), and there was a man who shopped there every once in awhile who would always come up to the counter and say "hi sweetie." i can't remember why i didn't say anything back (it may have been because my boss, who was probably the biggest asshole, was around), but now i would definitely say something like "the name's [nr]." and if he continued, i'd report it or something. i would definitely not say nothing.

or maybe the answer is just to be huge jerks, and they'll stop calling us these things.
160122
what's it to you?
who go
blather
from