ask_a_newbie Your Friendly Neighborhood Logan Hello...this for all that I don't know (aka: most of you) to get to know me better. So, fire away and don't spare any potent hostilities or glowing accolades. I love them all equally 020814 ... run run run See You at Carousel for the renewal Logon? 020815 ... confused lost and in need of help My girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year and I love her to death. I do anything for her, but there are times she just gets so depressed, I don't know what to do. I want to make her happy. I want her to smile again, I just don't know how to do it. Any ideas as to what I should do? 020815 ... jane why don't you tell us a little about yourself... 020815 ... Freak Just tell her you love her and how beautiful she is. Even if you get some kind of "whatever", or "yeah right" response from her she will still feel better whether she lets it show or chooses to stay sullen. 020815 ... melissah yes, tell her she is beautiful. 020815 ... confused lost and still in need of help I've tried all that. I tell her I love her every chance I get, in the morning when we wake up, in the shower, every possible moment. I tell her how beautiful she is, and she just says "yeah right" or "no I'm not". I don't know what to do. I just want to see her happy. I just want to see that smile that makes everything go away. 020815 ... Freak remind her of what made her smile in the first place. 020815 ... MisterFunkadelic not to be cruel, though i know that this is how it's gonna sound: it could be you. i hope you haven't done anything like telling her outright that her unhappiness has made or is making you unhappy... the sort of damage that could do would be irredeemable for the fact that you would have made blame a factor. do your best for her, but be careful ask her... is there anyone else she talks to? if so ask them as well. If she has anyone else she confides in at all, ask them, by all means 020815 ... confused lost and still in need of help I would never tell her her unhappiness is making me unhappy, even if it were true. I just want her to be happy.. but maybe you're right. Maybe I don't make her happy. I try so hard, and she's told me that she's just "messed up" and that it's not me. I just want her to be happy. 020815 ... MisterFunkadelic a guy i know actually said some shit like that, and why the lady keeps him around after he did that is beyond me by a damn sight. crazy coincidence, the ex-wife tried to lay that same line on me, even tough i was never unhappy (until i caught her cheating) i was always just the quiet type And again, i wasn't being mean or anything, just examining all the possibilities, maybe she's right after all, maybe it is her i'll agree with somebody earlier here, just do your best to show your love, even if she doesn't outwardly respond it may help her feel better inwardly hey, just because love has handed me a few cheap shots below the belt doesn't mean i don't believe it can work for some people lots of luck to you peace 020815 ... Your Friendly Neighborhood Logan Hmm...I see that I've started a bit of a fire in here. Okay then...well, I know how you feel with your girlfriend...often I experience the same thing with my wife. I find that the best thing to do is to just be there for her whenever possible, enjoy the good times, help her through the bad, and do whatever you can to find out what's bothering her. Granted, there are going to be a lot of times where you just can't help, and those times are going to hurt you like no other, but being there for her to cry on and talk to is equally important in the healing process as anything else. Be persistent...even when she says she hates you and wants you to go away, stay right there and prove to her that you're not going to leave. There's a lot about confidence in a relationship...in her, in yourself, but mostly in the faith that things are going to be all right with a little work at making things, well, work. I know it can be hard, but if you love her, then you know as well as I do that anything that can possibly do to help is well worth her happiness. I guess that's about all I have on that subject. Oh, and yes, my name really IS Logan, I went to high school with Silent Bob, and should be graduating from college in December. Anything else that anyone needs to know? 020815 what's it to you? who go blather from