_an_anonymous_journal_for_all_to_see Dreamer Ladies and gentleman! Step right up! Witness the trials and tribulations of a typical (or, as i would like to think, not so typical) 16 year old male...(soon to be 17 on June 23.) -------------------------------------- It's nice putting my life on display (or parts of it at least) I can pretend to be noticed...YAY! 050414 ... Moon Ladies and gentleman! Step right up! Witness the trials and tribulations of a typical (or, as i would like to think, not so typical) 16 year old male...(soon to be 17 on June 23.) -------------------------------------- It's nice putting my life on display (or parts of it at least) I can pretend to be noticed...YAY! damn....i should put this under a different name...dreamer 's been done... 050414 ... Twitch Fuck...i have underestimated peoples choices in names.... hmmmmmmmmmm this ones too cool,,,someone most have thought of it... Twitch 050414 ... delial heh, do what I do! click on someone's blather name, then erase their name from the url and substitute a name you think up, and keep doing that unti you find one that doesn't exist(yet). =P 050414 ... Twitch today was a day................ Ok...Gym makeups are given by a short (somewhat angry sounding) old guy name Mr. ROss...so (since i forgot my gym clothes one day, and i wanted to try and get a good grade) i came. 12 laps around the gym..... then Ross wanted me to wait...for a pretty girl so that we could do the next exercizes together 1 rite after another......... 100 jumping jacks:....I managed... 25 pushups: it was tough...but i did it) 25 sit ups: bad...but not too bad. 25 more push ups:ARRRRRDGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!! KILL MEEE!!!!!!!1 (i finally came to a point where i couldn't even think about the girl.. my arms wouldn't move..i tried as hard as a good and barely moved... Now as if god still wasn't being entertained enough...I let out a small.....well....... errrrrrr....i ripped one. I don't know if anyone noticed....(i hope not)..it could have been confused with a number of other noises. I finally finished the pushups...only to have........................ Another 25 situps: THIS Was Killer (though maybe not as bad as the push-ups) Finally! 25 alternate toe touches: These werent too bad... Me being REALLY thirsty and worn out when i did'em made them way harder...but still doable. DAMN...when i got home, I just CRASHED/......... P.S. I'm not a Really fat kid either...these were just really hard for me... P.P.S. here's some pix from myspace... http://profiles.myspace.com/users/14818845 (i like to pretend someone'll look :-) http://profiles.myspace.com/users/14818845 050414 ... Twitch work....shit........4 eyes cascading down,,,,,,,,mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm perpetual bliss ..................engulf.................... ctrllllllll alt delelleledl;safcasfapodsakdopsdsfjef maybe i wasnt meant to be here.... but then....was anything meant to be... please...i wanna be something....i really do........zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz --------------------------------------- translation: nite all 050414 ... Twitch Fuck.................. a D+ in Sci- fi.... The class seemed like a total joke.. techinically...grades arent due until Wednsday..there's still time... College?...I'm gonna have to do it.... just dont know how.................. I dont do any extracurecular activities....A's and B's seemed good enough...but the potential for this and a C in mathe isnt too promising....... I'll keep that suger-coated dream of "making it" in the back of my head...(with music) ooooo................someone said i sing good today.... but than i made a comment about how i wasnt singing good to someone else that day and they didnt stop me......I'm so paranoid.................................. weave weave SMASH ! ------------------------------- 050415 ... Twitch the 4th eye doesn't move//...not with me looking............................................................ But its ok I'll wait sometime yet again when GOd has time. ------------------------------------------Stitched my mout to an open car................................Got drunk at a 2 cent bar.................................... ------------------------------------------------------im tired but idk....i like doing this.........................................so remember its not what you do in life that makes you, it's what you taste.....................mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm 050416 ... iNsEcUrE_GoTh_GiRl hi twitch. i went on the link you posted. at least you know that one person is reading this. *smiles and waves* 050417 ... Twitch Awesome...someone read this. Thanks goth girl----------------------- --------------------------------------- 050417 ... Twitch errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr......................................went to a party yesterday........................................errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggg.......................it was (PG)................(Parents were upstairs)..........................ergggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg..............................I had my moment, played my guitar, and harmonica, and sang about fucking, Christopher Reeves.......Jewish people.........funny stuff....(My close friends know me as a "five minute God"),,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,..................................errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...................................cute girl(s)...............................................i flirted a bit..................................................................but in the end. i felt a bit like a loner 050417 ... Twitch drink from the cup..... their eyes are.... beautiful "Child knows what he's talkin' about" If they could only imagine.... Through omnicient vapors of water...and jazz......blazing with streetlights, and the warm smell of nocturnal departure from......shit....what is it.... That thing that bumps in the night.....you know......ya must......hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm/?? well maybe we're all puppets anyway///// --------------------------------------- errrrrrrrrrrrrGGG gots a report to conquer..... 050417 ... Twitch there's this prett girl i met at a weekend camp in upstate newyork... yea ill try not to get my hopes up... i mean i havent seen her since it (like almost a week ago) and probably won't for a while... Not that she's that far from me...it jus probably won't happen. i can pretend though... damn...right now there are children dieing, murderers killing, lovers fucking (not the most poetic word but it gets the job done ;-) ) and all i'm thinking about is some girl who i'll probably not even talk to in a year.... --------------- but hey............... thats life. -4/28/05 12:20am----- on a school night 050428 ... TWITCh Jamican men rummage through his belongings......4 and a half years... and this is where it's all gone... the poor bastard can't even walk straight..."i'm not drunk,,,,,,i dsofdfddj;fidsjf;dfg" he can't talk...he can hardly function...a third eye emerges from a vast sea of.. black COFFEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! mmmmm,,,,,,,,, Colombian.......... not that i car it just so.....so caffenated..... yea yea YeaYEA yEYAYEYAYEYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ill drink to that! and to another child of GOd 11! -end- 050428 ... Twitch God loves us...---Remember the third eye.... Osiris is watching love loves lover loving lovingly lovely drink a cup stitch a tag in your arm so that all my know... Prophesize to the mountains (the don't listen anyway.) Dream DreamDREAMDREAM ill dream it to an end....and end it in a dream... Free to flip their halos from underneith the sun.......... --------------------------------------- SO i workk at SHoprite,,,this girl who doesn't even know me for ME asked that i not charge her for some Milkshakes... She doesn't like me (in fact I think she thinks I'm a bit of a joke) I didn't charge her...Peer Pressure I guess... 050429 ... Twitch 5/1/05 Essays and shit to do..... god smiled at me the other day...he had nice teeth...and a nice toupe.....thoroughly enticing. anyone wanna be my muse...? wake up, coffee, eat, get sad,get a little happy, sleep...DREAMING all the way through... i barely have anyone... I'm offff adderall... 050501 ... that dude i've been sick for about 4 days now, i feel especially shitty today though it seems it's just a cold - it sure doesn't feel like it. i have decided to change my life drastically - decided this two days ago: i am going back to school and this time i will become an anthropologist. right. well, that's the plan but as it turns out, i am not rich and so i can't pay for tuition (which is sooo absurdly expensive), therefore i have to get a loan from the government, the problem is that i already have a loan with them and the chances of getting another one are ...unlikely. i've decided to do whatever i can to get the dollars, so we'll see. ...what lese, oh yeah, still single and my cat took another shit on the kitchen floor, better go clean it up. 050501 ... Twitch wow...the journal has been expanded by someone elses stories..thank you sir... (I have an essay to do on the Patriot Act, about 7 pages...due tommorrow of course......) --damn 050501 ... twitch i hope im good at singing. im pretty sure im decent on guitar...and im good enough on harmonica...singing's different though... Even when i listen to myself...i just don't know if im really good or not... 050502 ... tWiTcH BLAH BLAND TASTLESS GONE ...........i loveu) emotions are fading fast.................................................................... 5/2/05 .... 050502 ... TwitcH 5/8/05 GOd teisted his head in a most familiar fashion....yes the stars are made of ivory but thats no excuse for the pastel colored heart leaking at your lips. She and I will fall...I doubt it can work..... WHy? Because i'm a lonsome fuck...thats why....YES I can Be the life of THE PArty and I have been....just yesterday I had a crowd around me in town...i can look back on those moments, and brag about them like the insecure fuck I am. But when it comes down to it I don't have many friends... 050508 ... Twitch Sunlight rises..... then sets.... its funny but...its still hard to brliev that... Sometimes it just feels like the day will never end...so far however, its ended everytime... but who knows- 050509 ... mp3 Sunrise, Sunset Tevye's exquisitely poignant song from Fiddler on the Roof, was written by Sheldon Harnick (words) & Jerry Bock (music) http://www.heavenlyharpist.com/mp3/sunrise-sunset.htm 050509 ... AND Webshots - Images of SUNRISE, SUNSET........ ... SUNRISE, SUNSET........ THE BEGINING Fireboat sprays water at sunrise. Crane in the sunset. Sunrising ... community.webshots.com/album/85766568ZdCCJZ - 48k - Cached - Similar pages THE END OF A GORGEOUS DAY ... 050509 ... Twitch I met a girl.....online ...please dont dismiss me as a loser... i've only done it once before... It's nice to have someone ....anyone... yea.. it's late... ishould probably get some sleep...... I love you 9remember9 5my5 3words3 1I1 9LOVE9 9YOU9 ! 050517 ... twitCH i missed this prom. Not because im a huge loner...which isn't to say that i'm not lonely, but because they didnt have a lot of tickets (only 400 for a class of like....well a lot. Wouldnt it be awesome if i actually "make it" next year...and the last song that they'd play would be mine....Dreams are fun...Reality is too limiting. 050518 ... unhinged i guess my journal that is blather is not exactly anonymous, but it's definitely here for all to see if they know how to find it 050518 ... awhitewalrus i didn't go to prom and my mom was sad i don't know why i had plenty of fun that night and everyone i know who went, said it wasn't great so either they're lying and it was awesome or i am missing some reason as to why it's so great and on another note i have been thinking recently about my personality as it appears to others i have never really cared that much before because i like who i am but sometimes i think about things i have just said or done and i realize that sometimes i am such a bitch i don't like being mean so why am i acting like a bitch towards these people that are my friends? do i think that it will make them like me more? i seem to have a great fear of friends deserting me. one day i'll wake up and there will be no one here for me. i don't know why this fear would cause me to be mean, maybe i am bitter towards life in general, maybe i am bitter that two of my best friends are dating and the only guy who likes me has a girlfriend. maybe i'm bitter that all my friends seem to be secure with their current life situations and i am not. maybe i'm bitter, or maybe i am just a bitch. except when i ask, of course they say i'm not, they say i'm subtle. what the hell does that mean? i am a subtle bitch and that's okay because people don't notice? i notice and they notice because they know my basic demeanor, and i tell them more than i tell people who aren't my friends obviously, but other people don't notice? for some reason that is hard for me to believe. i am trying to end this reign of hate, but sometimes i can't control it. it just comes out because that's what i'm feeling. i've always had a problem with keeping some of my feelings to myself, that is when i know what i am feeling. 050518 ... Twitch i dont drink much...at all...yesterday was an attemot... 2 and a half puny glasses of 12 percent wine than the bottle emptied...(i didnt get drunk.) Strangelyenough when i told my mom that i was just doing it to see what it felt like she wasnt angry. 050518 ... twitch ok ithink i got drunk today....no prom tickets sold out parents want me to hang out with kids from our church and wont let me hang out with my friend (cause they think he's not,,,,,well.......goood for me........................eeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr --------------------------------------- more news as we get it. 050520 ... twitch i got out and had a decent time that